worry – Calvary Chapel

Imperfect Mama, Perfect Savior

Amy Nassar — Fri, 02 Sep 2022 19:40:17 +0000

As someone who has only been in the mommy club for a year and a half, it goes without saying that I am no expert on parenting. It’s something that you really can’t prepare yourself for in advance; you just have to dive right in and pray like you’ve never prayed before!

The thing I pray for most is that I would be sensitive to the leading of Christ as I attempt to raise this tiny human to be a good, kind person and a lover of Jesus.

Let me tell you – it’s not easy. In the age of social media, there is an enormous amount of pressure on moms to “have it all together”.

Someone out there in Instagram world decided that moms are only doing this thing right if their little ones are eating kale with every meal, can read by the age of two and never look at a television screen. Oh, and, while moms are cooking all of that kale and organizing endless activities for their kids from 7:00am to 7:00pm, they are expected to drink 65 cups of water, get 2 hours of exercise, prepare beautiful, healthy meals and maintain a perfectly clean house (acceptable for posting flawless photos, of course).

Okay, I’m exaggerating a bit. But can I be honest with you? There are many days that I’d love to post a photo of my beautiful daughter on social media, but I don’t. You know why? Because I can’t locate a five-by five-foot in my home with no mess.

Yikes, I know. But if you’re honest too, do you know what I’m talking about? Can you relate? The stress of trying to be the perfect mom is just too heavy a burden to carry on a daily basis.

On top of all of this, I wrestle with anxiety most days, and I know a lot of other moms do, too. It’s no wonder with the impossible goals that we set for ourselves and the pressure coming from every direction.

Beyond all of that, I worry about my family’s physical and mental health. I worry about our finances. I worry about all of the unknowns of the future.

It is in this place that I am comforted by the life-giving words of Psalm 25 that remind me “All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.” I also recall Corrie Ten Boom’s wise words, “never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.”

You see, problems are going to happen. We go from mountaintop to valley and back up to mountaintop throughout our lives, and that’s just the way it is here on this imperfect earth. So, I MUST choose to trust God with all of my unknowns. I MUST believe that He has a plan and a purpose for my life. I MUST entrust my family to my Savior.

If I don’t intentionally make these decisions each and every day, I crumble. And sometimes I do crumble; I don’t have this down perfectly. It’s faith in a perfect God and a daily surrender. I MUST choose to remember that “Perfect love drives out fear” (1 John 4:18). And the only place to find perfect love is in Christ Jesus.

With all of this in mind, I’d like to share 3 things that I’ve learned in the past year and a half since becoming a mom. I have much more to learn, but these are some important truths that God has spoken to my heart.

1. God loves my child infinitely more than I could ever fathom.

I’ve never loved another human in the same way that I love my little girl. She is part of me and I would give my life in a split second for her. Can you imagine the height of God’s love for His children? He sent His Son – His ONLY Son, whom He loved with all of His heart, because He loved US and deemed us worthy of everlasting life if we choose to follow Him.

It takes my breath away to realize how much God loves me. But He also loves my child in the exact same way! He loves her MORE than I have the capacity to love her.

I don’t know about you, but I could never send my daughter to die for someone else. So in the moments of worry, anxiety, stress and fear of the unknown, remember that God loves your little ones much more than even you love them! He has a plan for their lives and He will see it through. As hard as it is to imagine such great love, that is the truth, and I am so grateful for it.

2. The way I live demonstrates Christ to my child on a daily basis…or not.

One of my clearest memories as a child is waking up in the morning to see my mom sitting in her chair with her cup of coffee and Bible opened in front of her taking in the Word of God before anything else. I never realized the huge gift that was to me, and she probably didn’t either at the time. I feel so blessed to have parents who have loved the Lord with all of their hearts for as long as I’ve been alive.

I know that not everyone had the same experience as a child, but it can start with you! You can make a deep impact in your little ones’ lives simply by following Jesus and sitting at His feet in daily surrender.

I think of Mary and Martha on the day that Jesus came to visit. Martha missed the opportunity to sit at Jesus’ feet because she was too busy running around and trying to make everything perfect while Mary spent every moment with Jesus. I desperately want my daughter to see the heart of Mary in me.

Even so, there are days that I don’t get a chance to sit before the Lord first thing in the morning, despite my best efforts. The reality is that there will be days where we have to hit the ground running even though we feel so physically and emotionally tired that we can barely stand. When those days come, fall on Jesus. Remember that His grace is sufficient for you.

3. I am not my child’s savior.

Let me say this again: I am NOT my child’s savior.

I don’t have to have it all together. I don’t have to be responsible for making everything right in her world and in our home. I don’t have to fix everything. And let’s be honest, I can’t do those things anyway, but sadly that doesn’t stop me from feeling the pressure to try.

I’m not the savior of my home and that realization brings so much freedom. I want you to know that the best thing you will do for your little ones each day is to point them to their true Savior, Jesus Christ. Sometimes you’ll do it with tears in your eyes and sometimes you’ll do it with joy in your heart. Just point them to Christ, and you can be confident that in that moment, you are doing the right thing.

I truly pray that these truths speak life to you and release you from the burden of trying to be the “perfect mom”. Know that God sees you right where you’re at and He has placed you there for a purpose. He is the Rock on which you can stand when the fears and unknowns of life wash over you. Sit at the feet of Jesus and allow Him to guide you as you navigate this crazy mom life.

Hang in there, friend. You’ve got this and He’s got you.

Be Anxious for Nothing

Pilgrim Benham — Tue, 20 Feb 2018 06:00:00 +0000

I will never forget the day I received the hospital bill in our mailbox. I was having a particularly cheerful day up until that moment. As I reached in and perused the typical “junk” advertisements for a car lot sale, coupons for Memorial Day closeouts and an invitation to an exotic getaway cruise to the Caribbean, I began opening a letter addressed to my wife and I from the hospital. She had given birth to our son who was born two months premature due to a placental abruption. Thankfully, he was home and healthy, thanks to the incredible work of the nurses and doctors of the neonatal intensive care unit. We knew our insurance would be covering most of the bill, but here was the final verdict in my hands at last. I opened the letter and almost collapsed. It stated that our insurance refused coverage, and we owed the hospital around $115,000! Needless to say, I decided the Caribbean cruise could be our escape from the country before we had to pay the money…

For the entire day, I paced the house frantically. I prayed constantly. I spoke with my wife, and our conversation was vigorous and stressful. I texted my friends and asked them to intercede for us. I looked at the letter over and over again with contempt, asking God why He would do this to us. That day stands in my life as a textbook example of anxiety. And little did I know it would all change with a simple phone call later that evening…

Consider the things that make you and me anxious.

Finances, health, relationships, public speaking or losing something. Maybe it is the fear of something much more ordinary, like traffic or the to-do list in front of you today. Many people are anxious about failing or even succeeding. They begin worrying about the outcomes of situations, and then allow that worry to consume them. Eventually, their heart rate and blood pressure rise. They eat less (or more!) and unhealthily. They lose sleep. They grow exhausted and lash out at people they are in relationship with. Soon their thoughts consume them and cripple them. The peace that could be theirs is void, and every day becomes another futile exercise in fear. Some people turn to medication or therapy to help them cope with the difficulties. And it all stems from anxiety.

The Scriptures aren’t silent about anxiety.

Paul tells the Philippian church plainly: “The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:5b-7).

Did you catch that? “Do not be anxious about anything.” That pretty much sums it up! We aren’t to allow our minds to succumb to anxious thoughts but to bring our concerns in prayer and gratitude to the Lord. And we are promised that His peace (which is far greater than the peace that comes from understanding) will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus.

I’m reminded of the time Jesus’ disciples were faced with almost certain death. They were in a boat crossing the Sea of Galilee. This sea has a reputation for fierce squalls appearing virtually out of nowhere and becoming life-threatening within minutes. When this happened, notice what Jesus was doing:

“And when he got into the boat, his disciples followed him. And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep. And they went and woke him, saying, ‘Save us, Lord; we are perishing.’ And he said to them, ‘Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?’ Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?” (Matthew 8:23-27).

The disciples had every “right” to be anxious. Matthew points out that the storm was “great,” and that the boat was being swamped by the waves. This wasn’t a small storm, this was a strong tempest that had the potential to capsize the boat and drown all 13 of them. Because of that, they had every right and reason to be worried. No doubt they were probably trying to steer the boat safely, protecting themselves and seeking to expel the water that had swamped the boat. But what was Jesus doing?

Jesus was asleep. As the wind was howling, the waves were rising, the water crashing, the disciples screaming, the storm threatening, Jesus wasn’t worried. He was at rest. The disciples woke Him up and asked Him to save them. His response is telling: “Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?” That seems like an easy question to answer. “Why are we afraid? Because of certain death! Because of the wind! Because of the waves! Because our boat is about to sink!” But Jesus gets to the root of fear and anxiety: It is rooted in a lack of faith.

Anxiety is, in its truest definition, insubordination. It is a lack of faith.

Think about it, when we are anxious, we are placing our faith, rest and peace in circumstantial providence, not in sovereign providence. We think that by worrying about a problem, we will solve it. Worrying solves the problem no faster than ignoring it. Both of these are unbiblical responses and will only lead to hardship. We must submit it to the Lord.

We have a choice with every anxious thought to either bear it on our shoulders, ignore it and hope it disappears, or to cast it on the Lord, knowing He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7). Today, as you are reading this, what are you anxious about? Are you dealing with the problem or pretending it will go away? Are you harboring worry and fear in your mind or bringing the problem to Jesus? The disciples may have been afraid, but I like that they brought their concern to Jesus. Immediately, He rebuked the winds and the sea, and Matthew says “There was a great calm.” Is Jesus concerned about your problem? Is He capable of handling it?

The night I received the hospital bill, I made a phone call to our insurance company. Apparently there had been a billing glitch, and they apologized and said to disregard the bill. They would fully cover it! I fell out of my chair and ran around the room exclaiming God’s goodness. I had wasted an entire day stressing about an issue that didn’t even exist. I learned a valuable lesson that day: My job is not to live as a practical atheist, attempting to best God at His work. I needed to simply submit and rest and trust that either this was Him testing me or proving me, but even if we owed triple that amount, He would be glorified in and through our lives.

If we are subordinate to God’s authority and provision in our lives, we won’t step out of order and bear the responsibility of the outcome of our situations. God is sovereignly working all things for His glory and our ultimate good, and we need to trust that. If we will submit to His Lordship and rest, we will like Jesus be at peace in the boat no matter what storms rage around us. Even if that boat ends up being a cruise ship to the Caribbean.