Recently, I was asked to be one of the speakers at a retreat for millennials where the theme was “Legacy.” The definition of legacy that was put forth was: something transmitted by or received from a predecessor or from the past. In my experience, legacies are born out of relationships and moments that leave a mark and make an impact. As I prepared for my message, it caused me to think back on two men who shared moments with me and gave me opportunities that have left a legacy upon my own life and ministry to others.

A LIFE-CHANGING CONVERSATION

Richard Cimino was my high school pastor during my senior year when I attended Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa. It was a conversation with Richard over lunch one day that changed the whole trajectory and focus of my life. Richard lovingly said to me, “Rob, do you know what your problem is?” I was taken off guard but curious as to what he was about to say, so I responded, “No. What?” Richard proceeded to tell me that my problem was that Jesus was only a part of my life and not the center of my life.

Those words cut me to the core. I knew he was right. I definitely was a Christian and loved Jesus, but my life and priorities were divided like slices of a pie between school, friends, family, playing baseball (which was a major passion), my job and Jesus. Sometimes Jesus was a big slice, but at other times He was a small slice. The Lord showed me that He wanted to be in the center of my life and that all those other things needed to revolve around my relationship with Him. It was that conversation with Richard that would be the catalyst for what would happen a year later when I was in college on a baseball scholarship, and the Lord called me to quit playing baseball and pursue full-time ministry.

OPPORTUNITIES TO SERVE

Richard gave me my first opportunity to serve in ministry, as a leader in the high school youth group at CCCM. At first my role was just to help out in practical ways and to try to spend time encouraging kids the way that Richard encouraged me. Eventually it led to teaching Bible studies, leading home groups and co-leading the Sunday night youth gathering at the church.

However, it was Brian Brodersen who gave me my first opportunity to teach a Bible study. Shortly after the Lord called me to quit playing baseball in college and to focus on serving Him, Brian asked me if I wanted to take over teaching a lunchtime Bible study that he had been doing at University High School in Irvine, California. I told Brian that I didn’t know how to teach a Bible study. He told me that God would show me and to take a step of faith. So I did.

After my morning classes at college, I cruised out to the high school and basically shared with the students what God had been showing me in my morning devotions. Surprisingly, the students liked it and asked me to come back! I taught that Bible study every week for the rest of the semester. The students at University told some of their friends at Woodbridge High School about the study, and they invited me to come and teach a Bible study at their school as well. So all of a sudden, I was ministering to a group of students at both of those schools, even though I really didn’t know what I was doing, and God was blessing it. At the end of the school year, both groups wanted to keep meeting and suggested that they combine over the summer at a house on Thursday nights. So now I was driving to Irvine on Thursday nights to meet with over 60 high school students in a house. I still didn’t know what I was doing, and looking back on it now, I am sure that I taught some things that were heretical! But God was moving and working in spite of me, and through me, all because I was available and Brian gave me an opportunity.

A TRIP TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD

Another way that Brian left a lasting mark on my life was when he took me on my very first missions trip overseas. We went to Eastern Europe in 1989, right after the fall of communism. It was an incredible experience. One afternoon during the trip, I was able to lead a group of about six young men to Christ and then throughout the following week, a friend and I met with this group twice a day to disciple them. We met in the morning before school and then we met up in the afternoon, when they got out of school. By the end of the week, that group of six guys had grown to 30 teenagers who were hungry to know Jesus. It was a church in the making! When it was time leave the kids and head back to the United States, I told them that we would bring someone back who would continue to teach them about Jesus and help them grow in their relationship with Him.

Two weeks later I was on a plane with a young man named Mike Harris, who I knew from Richard’s high school ministry. Mike was a surfer kid that loved Jesus and had a gift in music and evangelism. By the end of a week back with the kids, things exploded, as over 100 young people were gathering every day to come and hear Mike preach the word and play music. That gathering would turn into what became Calvary Chapel Suboticia Yugoslavia.

Personally, that experience led me to never look at a city the same again. Now, when I go to any city in the world, my first reaction is always to have eyes to see what the Lord is doing and to ask Him what He wants to do in that city and if He wants me to somehow be a part of it. That shift in my heart and mind toward missions took place because someone gave me an opportunity to do something that I had never done before and to be used by God in a way that I didn’t think was even possible.

You see, the impact that Brian and Richard had on my life has inspired me to give young men and women, whom I have encountered over the years, an opportunity to be used by God. I have had the privilege of seeing many of them go on to do great things that have far surpassed anything that I have ever done. That, to me, is a tremendous joy! Sometimes I think we can overcomplicate serving God. I was taught that God is not looking for ability but availability.

I believe that we who are leaders in this season need to look for those in the generation behind us who love Jesus, who are available and who desire to serve Him, and give them opportunities that will allow God to blow their minds. It might look messy, and they may not get it right all the time; but we can inspire them to go for it and rejoice with them as God blesses. In doing so, we will leave a lasting legacy!

This is a message to pastors and those involved in church leadership, but I believe it is relevant to us all!

We experienced a new record of “interesting” in a one-week period at church recently. We had two “Satans” and one “Jesus” visit.

It’s pretty common for the unusual to happen at our inner city church, but this took things to a whole new level. Two devilish distractions didn’t quite make it into church, but “Jesus” did. From the beginning of worship, we were concerned for him. He was weeping, and we wanted to reach out to him.

One of our leaders was just waiting for worship to be over, so he could pray with him and see how he could help.

When our worship leader said, “Amen,” “Jesus” went straight to the stage, shouting that he was the third person of the Trinity. He was fast!

The ushers and I were right behind, trying to calmly escort him out. He didn’t want to leave, so we helped him a little more. I was proud of our men, as they were extremely respectful but also firm. As “Jesus” was leaving, he shouted out that he was the reason gas prices dropped by 5 cents. He added that he was hungry and didn’t have shoes.

Someone found him a pair of shoes, and our head usher took the young man to dinner. It seemed he was either high or off his medications. Either way, it’s sad, and now I’m known as the guy who kicked “Jesus” out of church!

Since my first church plant 18 years ago, we have had people come to church with every conceivable circumstance. I remember the first young man who came to church drunk and wanted to talk during the Bible study. The church consisted of only about 15 people at the time. There were no ushers, no boundaries, just a really tall, muscular, drunk guy weeping.

I asked him if we could speak after I was finished, and several minutes later, he agreed. We had a great chat, and from time to time, I would see him in town.

We continued a good relationship, and he knew that he was loved and not judged.

I wish I could say that I always “did the right thing,” but that’s definitely not true. I could mention (to my shame), several instances when I was more concerned about “church” than people. It’s easy to justify:

“You can’t help a drunk person, when they are drunk.”- Usually true.

“You can’t stop service for every single person that wants to interrupt.”- Also true.

Here’s the thing I’m learning. How I respond to interruptions and hurting people says A LOT to the church. 
Those of you who are pastors or church leaders, can I make a suggestion? Learn to relax a bit more! Things are going to happen in our services that turn the focus and throw us off a bit. Maybe that’s ok.

Jesus didn’t preach in sterile church environments.

The greatest truths the world has ever heard were probably spoken with the sounds of crying babies and the bleating of sheep in the background.

We work hard to create an environment where people can come into church distraction-free, but that is not always possible…and that’s OK. Let’s learn to relax. God is bigger than distractions. God is greater than disruptions. Who knows, if those moments will be an incredible opportunity to learn about mercy by showing mercy.

Every elite athlete has at least one thing in common – they have been coached to maximize God-given potential. In the context of sports, coaching is presumed and is an accepted and expected part of the culture. On the other hand, meaningful coaching and mentoring is less prevalent in the context of Christian ministry. Accordingly, the benefits of development are hindered and hamstrung.

If you want to influence God’s kingdom, there is likely no more rewarding use of your time than coaching existing and emerging leaders. The same is true for those who receive coaching. Kingdom leverage is created every time a leader is coached to be more effective. Church leaders continue to need support at every stage of development, because of the unique challenges that are experienced along the way.

Some of you have been blessed to have coaches and mentors along your journey. They encouraged you that you had the right stuff to finish well and motivated you to discover your God-given potential. They warned you about potential dangers you might encounter and how to avoid or overcome the obstacles that are inherent in every leader’s journey. Unfortunately, too many of you did not receive that type of support. You embarked on the journey and God was gracious, faithful and blessed your ministry.

Yet, don’t you agree it would have been beneficial to have someone who was ahead of the curve, with whom you could relate, to coach you along the way?

Have you ever thought about coaching others or receiving coaching?

What do coaches do?

Coaches provide intentional, relational support to create accountability for existing and emerging church leaders.

They assist in assessing and aligning God’s people with His plan. Gary Collins, a leader and pioneer in coaching, defined Christian coaching as, “The practice of guiding and enabling individuals or groups to move from where they are to where God wants them to be.” Christian coaches encourage others to find God’s vision for their lives and from following their own agendas to pursue God’s purposes. Miller and Hall, in their primer on Christian coaching offer the following definition: “Christian coaching is a focused, Christ-centered relationship that cultivates a person’s sustained growth and action.”

Coaching is primarily related to support. A coach doesn’t have to have all the answers, nor are they supposed to constantly tell other leaders what to do. Coaches often are most effective when they help leaders learn to listen to God for themselves. A coach’s goal is to help others succeed. The art of effective coaching can be learned, and the basic process is relatively simple. By following a basic framework and implementing some general coaching skills, you can learn to coach.

How does coaching differ from mentoring?

The primary distinction between coaching and mentoring is the process of training. Coaches generally ask questions to help a leader discover God’s answers. On the other hand, mentors generally give answers, rather than ask questions, in an effort to guide a leader. The coaching or mentoring style may both be used at any time of training. The mentor-disciple relationship is generally characterized by a mentor instructing a disciple, “Do this.” Yet, in a coaching relationship, the coach is primarily helping the leader to discover the answers [e.g. What do you think you should do?] and occasionally instructs the leader to “Do this.” Bob Logan notes, “Good coaching isn’t the art of giving good answers. It’s the art of asking good questions.” When a person discovers a course of action for himself, it will be followed with greater passion and conviction than when a trainer simply tells a leader what to do. What keeps existing and emerging leaders from receiving effective coaching, or becoming effective coaches?

There are numerous reasons, including ignorance of the benefits, but the four most common that I’ve observed are as follows:

1. Time:

Both coaches and the coached are concerned that they don’t have the time to for a coaching relationship in addition to their numerous other responsibilities. Nevertheless, an effective coaching relationship can be established in one hour per month, for 6-12 months. If you are presently unable to figure out how to carve out one hour a month, you’re very likely in need of coaching.

2. Money:

It can be discouraging to say the least when you see a leader charging $200+ for an hour of their time to serve as a coach. Let’s put aside the issue of whether that is a wise or valuable investment of resources to become more effective. I’m aware of many capable and Christ-like mentors who are offering to coach for no money or relatively little money. Trying to make a living by coaching is extremely challenging. So, the more capable leaders who simply recognize that they can give some of their time for the kingdom purpose of training, the more that money will be eliminated as an obstacle.

3. Fear of accountability:

The same attribute of chutzpah that motivates many to seek to become leaders is an obstacle to admitting that we don’t have all the answers and need help. When you discover that you are encountering obstacles to Christian life and ministry, then coaches are an answer. Rather than let the fear of accountability or inadequacy paralyze you, create a healthy relationship with accountability to overcome.

4. Where to begin:

Here are some ideas to overcome the obstacle of wondering where to begin. First, become familiar with a basic approach and general coaching skills. I’ve written a book on the subject called “Coaching,” and it is available for free here. Second, the team at Calvary Church Planting Network [CCPN] and Velo Church Leaders are prepared to coach 30 to 50 leaders for free in 2016. Third, we are interested in expanding the sphere of coaches willing to help aspiring leaders. So, if you want to receive coaching or be part of a team offering coaching, please don’t hesitate to contact me at bruce@velochurchleaders.org.